Etiquette Tuesday: Unsolicited Advice, Part II
I guess people still have not picked up this little tidbit but unsolicited advice is absolutely annoying. This week’s Etiquette tip is easy: keep your thoughts to yourself. There are times when it is your duty as a guest, friend and/or family to give advice that is not sought by the person you think needs your words of wisdom. There are other times especially if they host an event where you do not particularly care for the food, entertainment, etc. that you should keep your thoughts to yourself. There are a few questions that you should ask yourself before you give unsolicited advice: “Do you even know what you are talking about”? “Have you ever cooked/hosted/spoke at an event like this to warrant you the sheriff of wisdom on this topic”? “Have you ever been to the place/event you are offering advice on??”
This makes my list of top 10 pet peeves. Whether it happens to me personally or I see it on certain television shows (*side eye*), it irritates me every time. Typically if someone wants your advice on something, they will ask for it. If they do not ask for it, try prefacing your unsolicited commentary with: “Do you want my advice/thoughts on the situation/etc.?” Give the person a chance to make a decision on whether they want to hear how you did not enjoy the rice pudding they worked on all day to create for the dinner party or the costume that they picked out for Halloween that you loathe. They may want to forgo hearing your opinion. Unlike you, they have tasted your bread pudding and seen how you put together a bash but have kept their thoughts to themselves (*side eye to that last table spread*). They may not add the same value to what you have to say on a specific topic.
Please stop it. It is unnecessary and rude. Save this behavior for the four walls of your home and the people who live there with you. They can tolerate this behavior, the outside world, not so much.
Category: Etiquette Tuesday